Journal entry 5-14-09

I arrived really early for class on this day and was sitting by my lonesome in the hall and decided to dive into a journal entry. I had listened to MIA's Paper Planes on repeat for the 45 minute drive to school and was ready to shoot someone when I got out of my truck. :) Also, if my diction seems a little odd it is because I was so immersed in the world of Jane Austen that I was starting to speak like the characters. It was funny to me so I just let it flow.
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I had an enjoyable drive to school this morning. For one, I was on time. Which is more than I can say for Tuesday's class. Secondly, it was sunny. Thirdly, I had great music on LOUD! It was a bit of an emotional ride however and I dare say I felt a bit volatile.
I have been completely immersed in Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice as of late. First, I downloaded the e-book, then the movie, then I watched the movie, then started reading the e-book. I couldn't stand it due to my impatience so I started watching the movie while reading the book. I would read a scene then skip over and watch it play out on the movie. I must say that it follows the book quite well. I have found that I am completely falling in love with Mr. Darcy's character and I am quite compelled to see who the actor is that portrays him. I am none other than breathless every time I watch the scene where he professes his love for her. I ordered the complete works of Jane Austen the other day and I am ecstatic about reading and owning all of her books. I have already downloaded the movies Emma and Sense and Sensibility. The reason for throwing myself so severely into Jane Austen is to replace--displace--my obsession with the Twilight series and Edward Cullen in particular. My plan was to throw myself into some other love story and while it was hard I have succeeded in overcoming the all encompassing love I possess for Edward Cullen! :)

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I have since come into the piano sheet music for Pride and Prejudice and am learning my favorite song of the movie, Dawn. While I was able to shake Twilight for a little while I have fallen back into it and am now, shamefully, reading fan fiction to get my fix.

untitled...wait does that make it titled.

I want to stay in my own space
Why does the veil have to slide slowly
Down, over me, entrapping me, enslaving me,
Protecting me...I know why.


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Yellow skin, scars run deep
My burden I carry
Conflicting emotion agitates the pools within
building pressure, I seek release...always.

...yearning for more...

...ever yearning for more
Fire, I'm melting into the earth
staring to the moon.
Sparks leak, oozing from my body
my only release.
Darkness, laid out in my solitary confinement
magical, my sensations intoxicating,
Take me.

R.I.P. M.J.

A couple of my favorite Micheal Jackson songs and videos. Mike will always hold a place in my little girl heart.

My feelings exactly...

If I hadn't made me, I would've been made somehow
If I hadn't assembled myself, I'd have fallen apart by now
If I hadn't made me, I'd be more inclined to bow
Powers that be, would have swallowed me up
But that's more than I can allow
Bow, aww yeah
If you let them make you, they'll make you paper mache
At a distance you're strong, until the wind comes
Then you crumble and blow away
If you let them fuck you, there will be no fore-play
Rest assured, they'll screw you complete
Til your ass is blue and gray
You should make amends with you
If only for better health, better health
But if you really want to live
Why not try, and make yourself
Make yourself
Make yourself
If I hadn't made me, I'd have fallen apart by now
I won't let them make me, It's more than I can allow
So when I make me, I won't be paper mache
And if I fuck me, I'll fuck me my own way
BAH, fuck me in my own way
BAH, fuck me in my own way
BAH, fuck me in my own way
Fuck me in my own way
You should make amends with you
If only for better health, better health
But if you really want to live
Why not try, and make yourself
Make yourself
Make yourself
Make yourself
Make yourself

Made a new maxi dress

I made my 2nd maxi dress yesterday. This one only took me one evening so I am getting faster! YAY! I used the tutorial from here (Tutorial is on the right side of her page-THANKS MIMI!) again and this time I made a halter top bodice. I love how it turned out. It had a little blousiness where the skirt portion meets the bodice. This was unintended of course lol but I love the way it looks! I think it makes my waist look smaller. Anyway here are the pics. I haven't hemmed it yet so that is why its on the floor lol.

Some new pics and stuff

FINALLY got some batteries for the camera so here are a couple of pics. We took in about half of the goldfish we used for cycling our tank into the fish store today and brought three baby cory catfish home. We plan on getting about eight all together. Supposedly they will school if the group is big enough. They are so cute! I took these two pics of one of them. They are only about 1" long right now. I'm excited to finally be getting our permanent fish! The next pic is of a salad that I eat frequently. I am learning to make a few new dressings so hopefully I will find one I really like. I am kind of sick of my usual topping of cottage cheese and salsa. Next up is the long awaited pic of the latest shirt I finished. I don't really like it. While I loved the print on the fabric, I have decided that it was not the right print for this style. From far away I just look like a blob on the top half with no shape. Ehh, you live you learn right? I also included a video of Taison playing with our foster puppies outside. They loved each other. We took them back almost a week ago. It took me almost two hours to deep clean the room that we were keeping them in--and I had been mopping it every day! Needless to say we will be going back to fostering kittens instead of puppies. I do not know why it is sideways. It is not so on my computer. Sorry. Until we meet again bloggers!