listening to "Destiny" by Zero 7 for the 31st time...
literally...
Wondering if my Dad ever really loved me...
Worrying about who and what people think I am...
angry about that because I know that they will never really know...
hiding such a deep dark sadness inside...
feeling alone because of this...
does my brother really like me at all as a person...
what the hell is love...
I never sleep anymore...
feeling like I lead two separate lives...
feel strongest by myself...
confused because this is the opposite of what I have been taught...
Will I ever find another good friend...
how will it be...
what will they be like...
how long will I have with them...
how long do I have period...
wondering if I will die of cancer young...
I cried today and no one knew...
again...
why do I call my mother everyday yet cannot stand her...
what am I becoming...
am I destined to be this way until the end...
I am starting to think so...
is everyone just putting on a big show...
I know I am...
I want to be me but I don't talk...
I only feel...
words screw everything up...
this will only come across as just another depressing post...
this is me...
this is my identity...
I am invisible and insignificant to the rest of the world...
is there anyone out there who sees me...